He Knows....

Although I've been hurt, I choose to smile.

Although I've been lied to, I remain honest.

Although the pain cuts me so deep, I know the sun will shine in the morning because I know where I'm going......

They say the Lord only gives you as much as you can handle, and if this is what I have to go through to see brighter days then Dear Lord keep it coming, although it's not exactly what I expected.

Joel 2:25

A Blog by Pastor Joel Osteen
"He Always Gives Another Chance"
Everyone has missed opportunities in life. We can all look back and think, "Why didn't I put more effort into that relationship? Why didn't I take that job?" Or, "Why did I spend all those years running with the wrong crowd, partying, when I should have been getting ahead?" Maybe you feel like you've really missed something, but be encouraged today because God always has another season. He always gives us another chance.
It reminds me of a movie I saw a while back, "The Preacher's Kid." It's a modern day spin on the story of the prodigal. I read that it comes out on DVD soon, and what I love about this movie is that it shows that we serve a God who always gives us another chance.
It doesn't matter how you were raised or what circumstances you find yourself in, God says in Joel 2:25, "I will restore the years that have been stolen." That means God can make up years of your life. He can turn back time. You may not be able to relive your childhood, but He can make the rest of your life so rewarding and so fulfilling that it makes up for anything you may have lost.
You may feel like you've wasted years in a relationship that didn't work out, or years on a job that turned out to be a dead end, but be encouraged today because God is a restorer. Take a step of faith and believe that for every opportunity you've missed, every chance you've blown, God will make up the difference. No matter how many mistakes you've made, He's standing there with open arms ready to receive you and restore you and set you on the good path He has prepared for you!

OH BLESS HIM.... Ya Fakin PATHETICALLY HOPELESS LOST SOUL

I really hate that I had to ask my friends and family this! but considering I havent responded to ANY of his feeble attempts since July 11, 2009 he still hasn't gotten the hint. So, since that hasn't made a difference I figured letting my family know the situation couldnt hurt either.

Lord please help him move on and leave me and everyone that knows me alone. He isnt right and he needs help; no other help will do except coming from you. so please Lord Jesus help this poor soul. He needs you! just like I do =D

but FOR REAL LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE RYAN MERRITT!! FAK CATCH A CLUE YOU CRAZY SELFISH LUNATIC!!! You should pray REAL hard that my family doesnt know the entire truth of your "episodes" I've extended you as much Grace as I can and honestly I'm sick of it!!! I really wish you would get a life and leave mine alone!!!! go torture someone else!!! You are DEAD TO ME! kthxbye *sorry I have been thinking this for a VERY long time and never let it out but I'm done now =p hahahhaha*

Like my older brother asked, "can we laugh about this now?" LOL yes bradur we most definately can =D



Dear Friends and Family,

 I've tried to not have it come to this and I've continued to turn the other cheek and ignore his feeble childish ways. I wish I didnt have to ask this of you all. I've prayed and prayed that he would move on, grow up and find his own way; but unfortunately that isnt what's happening.

Without going into too much detail of the events that have occured since I broke up with Ryan and the last time I've spoken to him last July; I have a favor to ask of all of you. He is trying to contact me through people I know on facebook by sending them messages. Some have been threatening and alarming toward me and whomever else he is contacting. I have previously asked those that are closest to me that have let me know this has occured to NOT let me know because I didnt care to hear about it; he has been out of my life and that's the way its going to stay. Even though I dont believe he would do anything he's threatening to do; you never know and with the more recent messages and the inability of his family intervening I'm afraid the failed attempts and messages will cease to stop.

I, as well as a few others have already blocked him but he's finding more and more people to try to stay connected with. So, I ask that if you receive any messages threatening or non Please DO NOT RESPOND TO HIS MESSAGE and just Report his facebook account as well as blocking him. Responding will only give him the attention he is looking for. I realize that its a hassle and I apologize; but just blocking him isnt working he's continued to find more people to write. His Facebook account is under his name RYAN MERRITT and there are unfortunately a BUNCH of Ryan Merritt's on FB but just go off of the profile pic from the message.


Again I apologize for the inconvenience but I appreciate the understanding. God willing its been 9 months already and in his mind NOTHING has changed and I wish him the best but I also wish he would leave me and everyone who knows me; the hell alone!!!


Thanks guys Love you bunches!! and Thank you again for your understanding and cooperation.


Oh and ps please email me a copy of the message you recieve; I need it for the "collection" ... JUST IN CASE I NEED to take acton

Rings of Time

Something ironic and Crazy has me questioning why and for what purpose....

Several weeks ago my families house was burglarized and minoot items were stolen. Which in my family, we're not too materialistic and tend to think more on the optimistic side ... "well time to upgrade" or "things can be replaced" very true. Thank goodness for insurance =)

Its the violation, invasion and centimental items that were taken that puts a whole in our hearts more than anything. They took some of my moms jewelry including her wedding ring =( among other things. However the ironic thing about this is shortly after my Dad died; my grandparents house was burglarized also and my dad's wedding right was stolen as well.... CRAAAZY RIIIGGHHTT??!!??!! The Irony! Not sure what it means but its definately a question that only God has the answer to. 

Hump Day =(

Wednesday... oi ya wekae! When i moved back to Las Vegas from Maui on Thanksgiving of 2008 i sold pretty much EVERYTHING i owned including my 04 Honda Civic and moved with 2 suitcases =) Well i decided to sell my car for what i owed for a couple of reasons; 1) my ex f@%ked it up and 2) my dad said he'd help me get another car when i moved back.

well we looked at 1 Saturn togther and then he decided to give me his Lumina LTZ  and gave me a check for what he was gonna spend on buying me a car and my initial reaction was ok cool .... ill jus get a pretty car later LoL and as time went by i began to realize that eventhough i am SO VERY GRATEFUL and everytime i saw a Honda Civic like mine i got Real bummed thinking to myself "I hella downgraded" LOL Pathetic i know but its the truth.

well this past weekend my dad and i came to an agreement that he would sign the car over to me and take me off his insurance. So the DMV is where i was headed. I tried on Tuesday but the line was out the entry door *normal for the dmv* but it was WINDY and COLD and i dont do Either of those LoL so i bailed and said i'd try again tomorrow *wednesday ... I made it to the DMV on Wednesday around 9am and it wasnt windy =) YAY

i ended up being there for 5 hours! and come to find out i couldnt register the car because my dad and i pulled a podagee move and he signed on the "buyer" line and i signed on the "seller" line =/ Freakin A! LOL so i decided to take a new picture for my drivers license just so i wouldnt have been there for completely NOTHING. LOL =D

So around 2pm i headed to school. Took a mens haircut and it was extemely slow after that. and i was soooo tired and sleepy so at 5pm when we get our 15 min break i decided to chill in the quiet of my car and take a quick nap. That rejuvenated me to last the next couple of hours. When i decided to leave around 7 ish i started packing up my things and realized i lost my keys =( AAAHHHH!!

Yup you guessed it i Locked my keys in my car!! Mother Fucker! with no spare and its 7pm after hours! Son of a Bia! So $124 dollars and an Hour & a half later i had my keys in hand was able to head home! EFF!! i was sooooo mad at myself! this entire time with this car and never has that happened.

needless to say It wasnt thee greatest day and the other students and i were joking like "bad omen" perhaps?? 1st our house was robbed a few weeks ago, then the DMV Fiasco for nothing, then i lock my keys in my car GRRREEEAAATT!! hopefully thats it! LoL

oh and dad sees my Facebook status of "bad omen perhaps" and takes it soooo seriously and tells me "thats the devil trying to get the best of you, this is a good thing thats happening to you..." blah blah blah and im trynna run put the door to get to class. I felt like saying OH EMM GEEE dont take it so seriously dad geez can i vent damn! the devils in me dad what do you want hahaahaha joking. but for real! so serious LoL

anyway needless to say ill be making another trip to the dmv this week =( hopefully it will go smoothly and fast ... stay tuned =)

I'm in Love with MINI COOPER!

Oh Mini Cooper! Come to me! I WILL HAVE ONE .... THE EXACT ONE I WANT.... CUSTOMIZED .... maybe even custom paint =p

The hotel I work at is hosting the Sin City Mini Cooper Club and directly in front of the front desk and in my lobby there sits a gorgeous mini just staring at me... calling my name! FAK

My preference would be a hard top... originally but this convertable staring at me has got me on the fence about that =p I CANNOT begin to describe how much I want one of these babies!!! I've wanted a Mini for as long as I can remember!!

OMG!!

I WILL HAVE ONE! IT WILL BE GREAT, IT WILL KICK ASS, AND IT WILL BE MINE!!!!

Dear MINI GODS,

Hear my plea! Please reward me with a beauty such as thee! I promise to take care of it & Love it and cherish it =) OH PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!! I've never begged for anything nor have I ever wanted anything SOOOO BADLY! 

SEE!!! MINI'S ARE COMPLETELY *&* UNDENIABLY FOR ME!

*in the words of "My Cousin Vinny"..... "I THINK YOU SHOULD GIVE IT TO ME"

KTHXBYE! =D

SHEESTERS!!

Last night was a Great night! My SHEESTERS & I were reunited! I love these ladies from my college days!! My down ass chick Ena Lee and her man drove in from Long Beach and Marivic flew in last night too!! Even though Melsi, Arlyn and I all live here in Vegas our lives and schedules are so hectic that we're lucky to see each other once or twice a month =/ but that's ok because it was so rewarding to be reminded what true, genuine friends these ladies are. Its like we've never skipped a beat! and we haven't =D

Its incredible to come to that realization and to remember that we've known each other since 2002! I cannot begin to describe how grateful I am for friends like these. Aside from Geisha and my family, these ladies have and will always be with me and in my life! Thank you for reminding me how special our relationships are! I LOVE YOU ALL!

*minus a few*taken in 2002*